Friday, August 15, 2014

A Great Loss

"A Great Loss"

I knew I was unimportant. In the hustle and bustle of everyday life I am invisible to her eyes. Nah – she nary cast a glance at me, and even if she did, I must say the look is never affirmative. Usually it ranges from glowering distaste to say the least, and glaring disgust at the worst.

“Why are you here? Why don’t you go away?” She mutters maliciously.

But I did stay. I did not go. Despite the lack of cordiality and the constant contempt I hang on. I persisted because I know that she needs me. I am there in her lowest moments – to share her sorrow and to bear the burden of her binges. I am there to sustain her purges, when she pounded madly on the machine and work herself to frenzy. I’m by her side always, supporting her every move, even at my own expense – waxing and waning at her whim and wishes.

But today I received terrible news – that she is going to get rid of me once and for all. Apparently, after all I’ve done for her, it is still inadequate. The last thing I am supposed to do for her, is to be a scapegoat and be sacrificed for her sins. She had found the ‘Final Solution’, and is all set to sever the ties that bound us. That a swift, slick, slice is going to put asunder what God had joined together.  I shudder to think of the cold sharp blade coming between us. Why doesn’t she want me? Why make me go away? Am I that dispensible?

Perhaps because I’m really unimportant.

I’m just a fat cell.


Sometimes, when you start off something, you've no idea what sort of paths it'll lead you to. In my case, I recently started a rebel-ution to the rationality and factual way of presentation that is pervasive in the financial blogosphere. I'm not saying that it's wrong, it's just that we need a balance between the proverbial rationality of the mind and emotions of the heart. Stories always tug at your heartstrings, while numbers and facts appeal to your minds. I'm thinking that the pull of the heart is more important.

These two are not necessary mutually exclusive too. In fact, Warren Buffet is known for his folksy ways of presenting normally hard cold financial facts into likable stories. It's his way of marrying story telling and factual presentation that makes so many people want to attend the annual Berkshire shareholder meeting in Omaha.

To those who think that reading fiction is a great waste of time, I empathize with you. I used to think that way too and it's only very recently ('s been about 7 years now) that I picked up a novel to read. And after reading stories upon stories, I came to the realization that the setting of the novel isn't as important as the message that is sent across. The message is masked in between the dialogue and descriptions of scenes, but it's there if you put effort to reflect after reading. The message you get is all the more etched into your mind simply because it's not handed out like a spoon to your gaping mouth. You have to work for it. And the messages changes all the time depending on the moods and circumstances when you read the same book! What sorcery is this?!

You know, in Bullythebear, I never had a guest post. But this is going to be the first. The author of this guest post is infected with the story telling bug too, after reading a few of my short stories:

1. An Empty House 
2. It Would Have To Do
3. The secrets of the millionaire dwarfs
4. My Father

She's none other than my wife.

Her post might not have much to do with the themes that I normally blog about. But it'll give a different perspective and world views in the pretty male dominated financial blogosphere. Diversity of views is always a good thing.


Singapore Man of Leisure said...


I was right!

When I was reading this story, I was a bit perplexed...

The "voice" is different...

LP, send my shout-out to Mrs LP OK?

Your woman is COOL ;)

la papillion said...


Haha, you can suss me out from a multitude of voices...that's very perceptive :)

She said thanks! :)

Anonymous said...

Hi LP,

I for one, will not show empathy to fats... I would like to divorce them too, maybe not through a knife, I would rather have muscle as mistress, and hopefully become my new wife...

Haha guys have self-esteem problem over image too, u know.

la papillion said...

Hi sillyinvestor,

Wah, muscle as mistress, nice one!

Poor fats...nobody likes :/

Unknown said...

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