My spending threshold

I always believe we should grow bigger than our problems. It's the way to make a big problem smaller, simply because you've grown bigger in size. I've written about these topics at length here:

1. Of dragons and men
2. The relative size of your problems
3. Outgrow your problems
4. Growing bigger than your problems


In the past, I used to fret about $10 meals. I only had very little pocket money and that's all the budget I had which also includes transport, stationeries and other expenses. That happens all the way up to university where I had to plan my meals properly. If I had too many restaurant meals (even those around $10 to $15), I'll have to scrimp and save the rest of the pocket money to last the entire month. So, during that time, my threshold was $10.


As I work and earn my own keep, that gradually increased to about $25. I fondly remembered the times when I was dating, and I had to spend money on movies, restaurants and cafes...It's not so easy for me. The average spending would amount to maybe $30 per outing, more if you have to pay for the other party. That's a lot of money for me, considering I only have $120 to 150 per month (if I remembered correctly) during my university days. So, during that time, my threshold was $30.

You find that at different periods of your life, this threshold where you have to think hard about spending will increase. From fretting about $10 for a meal alone, to $30 for a day's outing, to $60 for a all-boys drinking session, to $150+ for a good smartphone, to $16k downpayment for a car, to $40k COV and on and on. I think after spending thousands for my wedding and renovation, I don't really worry over things below $100 any more. It's like once you've completed Expert level in a game, playing Beginner level is just a walk in the park.


I think in the past, I was very concerned about the absolute price of things because my budget simply doesn't allow that to happen. Gradually, I realised that shopping for things that are value-for-money is more worth while in the long run. That took a longer time than I feel is right. I used to buy cheaper razor blades, cheaper shoes, clothes but they are really of lower quality. It turns out that I have to spend more time and effort buying newer cheaper and lower quality stuff. That changed when I bought my first pair of good Clarke shoes.


Compared to the usual Bata type (less than $30), Clarke shoes are easily $100 to $150 over. I remembered I took a long time debating over it, trying to work out the sums. My threshold back then was still around $100. Eventually I got won over and that changed the perspective that I see things. Things that I want and will use for a long time, I don't mind spending a lot of money on them. Things that I don't want, even if you give it to me for free, I also won't want it. It's simply eliminating wastage.


That eventually spilled over to food as well. In the past, I would gladly spend less on food so that I can conserve my budget. I would never order fruits...a platter of it cost more than what I spend on a proper meal - a meal that consists mainly of carbo but is filling. Drinks? No way, I would never order them since ordering one soft drink can be half the cost of my meal. I'm glad those days are over. The health effects of such actions cannot be belittled. But that was in the past when money was tighter than it was now. I'm glad I lived through it though I hope I'll never go back to those 'dark days' again. And who I am now is shaped by the experience that I had in the past, so no regrets over those. I'll probably do the same thing again if I can go back time.


Back to the topic of growing yourself to make your problems smaller. My stance is this...you can only save so much, and there's only so much cost to cut. Once you've done what you can to cut your expenses without feeling unbalanced, the only way to grow is to increase your earnings. Once you start finding ways to increase your income, you find that you're not just surviving. You're living a proper and balanced life. Maybe even thriving. What's balanced is subjective, but I think if you feel shortchanged by your own circumstances, that's not balanced anymore. I'm not a hermit and I need to spend money, and so I do. I shouldn't have to feel guilty over this.


In the midst of saving up and planning for the future, remember to live a little right now. While it's important to hedge for a long life, it's equally important to hedge against an unexpectedly short life. Financial freedom is a mindset where money is no longer a concern. A situation where you have too much money and you're still concerned with money is as bad as a situation where you have too little money and you're equally concerned over it.


Okay lah, maybe the former is a little better.