Thursday, November 24, 2011

Starting a new friendship with an old friend

Today I went to Sitex (the computer exhibition at expo) with a new friend. Rather, he was an old 'new' friend because I've known him for many years but perhaps this time round, I really treated him like a friend. Kind of sad, but I'll always say it's better this way then never. You will never know the unintended consequences when you sow a seed into the universe. In my case, the seed is me getting a flat, renovating it and eventually moving out of my current home into it to live another sort of life. The known consequences are the drain into my financial resources, and of course the time and effort needed to ready the flat into a livable and homely place for me to start a family. The unintended consequence of this seed is that I started to know a friend all over again. Unintended is not necessarily bad, it's just...something that is not known in advance until the event happens. This new friendship that I started is, by no means, bad, of course.



This is my new Xerox printer that I got from Sitex 2011


So we went around Expo getting the things that I needed to get the new flat ready for my move-in. Firstly, I needed to get a broadband connection so that I can access the internet at the new flat. Since during computer fair, there's usually a good discount or extra freebies for new sign ups, I wanted to go there early to queue (if necessary) in order to get the good value plans that I wanted. Eventually, when we reached there, there wasn't such a promotion for the plan that I was looking for, so I didn't even queue for it. But for the few days before Sitex even started, my friend and I began discussing different possible set ups in my new flat. He is used to (and still is) tinkering around with his computer, ever since he got one maybe like 25-30 yrs ago and had been an avid computer hobbyist ever since then.



After getting my printer, we went over for lunch at Lerk thai there, where I treated him to thai food. It was a rather strange feeling because I can't remember having lunch with him in a restaurant for ages (maybe never, sad-ctually). We never really have a close relationship and I would so like to begin one right now. What better time than now, because we're never going to get any younger and more energetic than we are today. With that thought in mind, I also went to book a tour with him and his wife, even though I hated those guided tours and much prefer to go free-and-easy. In guided tours, you are more like having a work schedule with a fixed agenda every day, rushing from one tourist hot spot to the next, snapping this photo and that, buying the must-eat snacks and visiting the must-visit localities. It doesn't feel like a holiday at all; it feels like work.



But for them, I'll do it. It been a while since I went to a tour with them. The first time was a trip to Genting Highlands when I was 15. The next was a trip to HK when I was in my early twenties. This up and coming trip would be the third. Three pathetic trips in over three decades of us knowing each other. I think I can and should do more.



After all, they are my parents and I am their son.


(Thanks smol and ak for their blog posts so that I was suddenly 'jolted' to spend more time with my parents. My parents are still younger and I'm younger still, so there's a good many years to begin a fresh new relationship with my parents - to know them as friends.)


17 comments :

Singapore Man Of Leisure said...

Hello LP,

My biggest "reward" for blogging close to 1 year now is getting to know inspirational cyber friends like you.

To borrow a phrase from CW8888, we feed off each other :)

Wow! You raise east attack west. And I thought your pic is about re-acquainted with your printer...

Got fooled again... Like your previous blog post with "no" title. And I thought it's a new writing technique! LOL!

AK71 said...

Hi LP,

This is an unintended and positive spin off from sharing that old blog post I did on "Chap Gor Mei" in SMOL's blog recently. So, credit must go to SMOL for getting me interested enough to post a comment in his blog. ;p

Yes, spend more time with our parents when they are still around. We are not getting any younger.

I make it a point to spend important dates together with my parents and to go on vacation with them at least once a year, sometimes twice or thrice. Even short weekend trips are wonderful.

As I age, I understand the problems they face such as failing memory and being slower. I am also much more patient now. So, going on holidays together, I am more concerned about their well-being than my own enjoyment in recent years. That is the way it should be. :)

Createwealth8888 said...

Hi Brolp,

With this blog post, it is the right time to have kids. Work harder and by end of next year we will have gathering at your house.

LOL!

Anonymous said...

Nice xerox printer! I thought of getting one myself, but figured i'll stick to a cheap mono printer from samsung!

Hrm... I hardly meet my parents these days and only went overseas twice since I was born (~3 decades ago). Guess I still have a decade to clock in 1 more trip ^^

Sigh, I'm incorrigible :(

Ee Chuan said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
PanzerGrenadier said...

Hi LP

That's a very touching story. Yes, sometimes when we grow up, get married and leave the nest, it's tough to continue to develop close relationships with parents.

For me, my relationship with my mother became much closer after my daughter was born. Now she visits my daughter twice weekly to play and supervise the maid when either my spouse or I are out in the evenings. As we chat when she's over with my daughter, I start to discover more of her life stories that have never been told when I was growing up.

Cherish these times as our parents (and ourselves) do get old with the passage of time :-)

Be well and prosper.

Temperament said...

Hi LP,
Most parents will give and give to their children if they are able to.
They only expect their children to recognized them as their parent. When you become parent you will really know what i mean.

OT83 said...

Hi LP,

I like your post! and I got cheated! haha you are talking about your parents.

I am having the same guilt. It had been a long time since I go out eat with them in restaurant or go overseas. Maybe I should do something while I can. :)

Createwealth8888 said...

It is the duties and love of parents to take good care of their children; but Singapore Law will enforce the children to lawfully take care of their parents.

It will be the saddest days of these parents when such thing happen to their children. :-(

AK71 said...

Hi OT,

Yah, you better. No need to eat in restaurant lah. I brought my mom out to eat kway chap last night. Both of us like kway chap. We enjoyed ourselves! This was followed by chendol for her and green bean soup for me. Burp... :)

la papillion said...

Hi SMOL,

Haha, come to think of it, it really looks like I'm talking about my printer, at least from the first paragraph :) We do indeed feed off ideas from each other, that's why we're a community of singaporean finance bloggers - a small and close knit circle!

Hi AK,

It is really positive spin off. I hope that I also can spin off a few of my own, to make pple jolt out of their 'sleep' and realise how little time they have left with their parents. I totally understand what you mean by being more concerned about their well being :)

Hi bro8888,

Is this how you check whether pple are ready for parenthood? LOL

la papillion said...

Hi anonymous,

Haven't really tested the printer though, cos my desktop is not shifted there yet :) Should be good :)

We are have our standards to meet when it comes to spending time with parents :) No need to compare :)

Hi PG,

Indeed, it's during specific instances or rather opportunities that are created that we can bond with our parents. Normally I seldom talk to them until now too :) It comes one full cycle isn't it?

Hi temperament,

Hmm, I would have to experience it myself firsthand, but for now, I believe you!

la papillion said...

Hi OT,

Haha, you got cheated :) Think about it, plan for it and execute it. Life's too short to keep planning but never get around to doing it :) I believe no need to be somewhere expensive, even a good meal (even one that you cook on your own or cook together) should be an enjoyable experience :)

Hi bro8888,

Very sad indeed...I won't be like that!

Anonymous said...

That is a very nice article LP.

Blackjack

Createwealth8888 said...

The reason why we should get married and have kids so that 30 years later there will be another similar article written using another technology

crystal said...

Hey LP,

I'm fooled by the title but I am impressed with the way u've written this blog post!

I think you can consider writing a 10 year series on how to write or examples of a brilliant composition! Ha Ha.

As time passed and as we aged, it's all the little things that we have done during these stages that created all the fond and unforgettable memories in life.

Keep it up, LP! ;)

la papillion said...

Hi Blackjack,

Thanks :) I came up with it in an instance. I found that the best post that I had took less than 10 mins to write. It suddenly sprang into my mind and I quickly went to my computer to write it down before it 'escapes' :)

Hi bro8888,

I'm not so anxious to have someone write such things about me though, but I can see your pt :)

Hi crystal,

Wow, rare guest :) I do agree with you, as we grow older, we tend to do little unforgettable stuff that even if you have all the money in the world, you might not be able to replicate if the moment had passed.

It's good to be able to afford such luxuries when we can. By afford, I mean both financially and most imptly, having have the spare time and energy :)

See you around more often okay? :)